A Hyperbolic Picnic

"Oh." Cyril fidgeted.

Rick looked at Emily. "Wanna fight again?"

"Eh, not really." Emily covered her mouth and yawned.

Cyril thought some narrative might be nice right about now.

Mr. Popo was taking a bath with the Super Real Holy Water when he noticed a lizardman walking around the Lookout. He had a terrible rash (( ;3 )) and it got Popo curious. He checked to see if the Senate was in session, but the door hadn't materialized. He figurdd the HBTC must be occupied. He gripped the handle, and flew into the conversation.

Rick was about to fall over in 'anime rejection' when a black man flew into him, knocking him over into Emily. "Christ! What was that?"

Emily was almost knocked out of her chair. She looked about wildly. "What the-"

"DON'T LOOK HIM IN THE EYE." Cyril shouted, panicked.

Rick blinked, "Why not? What would this guy possibly---"


Popo tackled him and began bitchslapping him to death.

Cyril looked on, horrified. There was nothing he could do.

Emily gasped. "W-Who ARE you!?"

Popo turned to Emily and screeched, "PECKING ORDER." He slapped her against the wall, which in an infinite room is... weird.

Emily hit the wall and was more shocked than hurt, "HOW IS THAT- THERE ISN'T A WALL WHAT THE HELL"

Cyril's wings wilted. "What do you want from us!?"

Popo turned to Cyril with a crazed look in his eye that would turn any man into a coward, "I WANT YOU, BITCH." He charged at Cyril and was about to go to the Rape Room when Artik woke up.

"Popo," he yawned. He got up and clapped him on the back. "How the hell are you?" Popo just rotated his in a way of saying, 'Same ol'.'

Cyril almost screamed like a tiny child, but then Artik saved him. Cyril muttered under his breath to Ryuzaki and Emily, "Don't look at him directly, answer when spoken to, and just. Let. Artik. Handle this. He's the only one that I know of who can handle Mr. Popo."

Emily nodded stiffly.

Rick gurgled blood.

Mr. Popo and Artik were laughing, and Artik said, "Well. Have a nice day." And knocked himself out.

Popo kicked Emily in the stomach. And the back. At the same time.

Emily crumpled to the floor and screamed in pain.

Cyril jumped in surpise. He whistled for his ship. Nothing came. "Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck..." Cyril backed away from Mr. Popo. Cyril morphed into Mr. Popo's likeness in a last ditch attempt to escape some horrible fate. Mr. Cyril stared blankly at Mr. Popo.

Mr. Popo stared at Mr. Popo, blankly. Legend has it no god could withstand a staring contest against Popo.

Mr. Cyril sweated nervously. His hands fidgeted. Legend had it that not even the gods could withstand Mr. Popo's stare, and poor Cyril knew it. Cyril had to do something. So he began laughing. He began laughing just like Mr. Popo.

Mr. Popo hadn't laughed, so threw the other into a wall, "PECKING ORDER "

Mr. Cyril hit the wall with a loud thud and turned back into his original form. "ARTIK WAKE UP YOU SON OF A BITCH." Cyril yelled in absolute panic.

Artik muttered something in Latin and went back to sleep. Popo burst into dust and that was that.

Both Emily and Cyril sighed in relief. Cyril walked over to Rick and healed him as best he could. "Thank goodness Artik was here, eh?"

Rick got up and sighed, "Although stuff like this seems to be a hallmark of his attendance.

"Yeah it does." Cyril said thoughtfully.

"Exactly how often does stuff like this happen to you people?" Emily asked, concerned for her well-being.

Rick shrugged. "Everytime we land somewhere?"

"And sometimes before we even land anywhere." Cyril added.

Emily looked a little overwhelmed at such a prospect. "Oh. Have, uh, has anyone died from all this yet?"

Everyone pointed at Artik.

"Yeah, there was him. But he's still kicking. Sorta." Cyril admitted. "But I don't think anyone else has. Except Zayn. He actually died more than once I think. And Rosentan, but he came back. Artik killed Makoto that one time by accident, but he came back too. Hmm... I think that's about it."

Emily stared at Cyril. "So 4+ deaths attributed to this, right?"